Friday October 26 2012
Mock the Quotes: Iron Bonucci

From heroic Leonardo Bonucci to DJ Sebastian Giovinco and Serse Cosmi’s Disneyland, Susy Campanale rounds up the week’s daftest statements.

“It all happened in a matter of seconds and it came from an instinctive reaction and certainly not an attempt to emulate the superheroes you see at the cinema.”

Leonardo Bonucci denies that when punching an armed mugger he made the Iron Man repulsor blast noise

“It is normal to see that when a team like Juve wins and keeps on winning, they are going to get irritating for the other sides. I hope to be irritating for another 10 years, then I can retire.”

Sebastian Giovinco aims to follow the career trajectory of a DJ

“We’re not predictable.”

We knew Mirko Vucinic was going to say that

“If there’s something I really do not miss about Italian football then it’s the controversy. Excessive, repetitive, boring, tiring and even nauseating controversy.”

Let’s have a 30-minute debate about what Domenico Criscito really means by that statement

“I divide critics? Good, as only the mediocre are in the middle of the road.”

Giovinco is strictly classical or rock

“On a psychological level the three points could take the fizz out of Napoli.”

Claudio Marchisio adds they can always stick a silver spoon in the top

“There is a very Italian mentality here at Montreal Impact, the level is very high physically and they are real ‘animals’ on the pitch.”

Alessandro Nesta presumably means moose

“I won’t make a prediction, though. If I were to get it right, I might get another dawn raid by police!”

Criscito is also now terrified of scratchcards

“There do not seem to be any insurmountable teams, as even Juventus are a good side but not unbeatable.”

Apart from the 47-match unbeaten run, Sergio Cragnotti

“Siena is not Disneyland.”

Serse Cosmi points out he’s more Shrek than Mickey Mouse

“We saw Milan changed and adapted to face us, which means Malaga have become a big club and deserve to be in the Champions League.”

It’s not Malaga that are big, Manuel Pellegrini, it’s that Milan got small

“It looks to me as if our system of rotating the squad in Europe is being followed by other more prestigious clubs too.”

And it’s not working for them either, Walter Mazzarri

“Mbaye Niang has great qualities, but off the field he is an immense disaster.”

Tell us what you really think, Didier Deschamps

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