Monday March 10 2014
They said what?!

Daniel Osvaldo's Pirate promise, Mauro Icardi's Wayne Rooney link and the REAL refereeing conspiracy in Susy Campanale's round-up of bizarre quotes.

“Will I dress as Jack Sparrow if Juventus win the Scudetto? Alright, I’ll do it! Promise!”

You mean Daniel Osvaldo isn’t already a Johnny Depp tribute act?

“People say I remind them of Wayne Rooney, but my idol was always Batistuta.”

Maybe they were referring to Mauro Icardi’s love for older women

“How has it been in Turin? I really like the city, because I lived seven or eight years in Manchester and to live in Manchester is difficult.”

Yet Carlos Tevez opted to stay there even after changing clubs

“The secret to styling my beard is not to style it!”

You’ve heard of bed hair, now Osvaldo introduces the trend for bed beard

“I have always had a peaceful rapport with Roma fans. They’d ask me for a picture and then say they were Romanisti!”

Hernanes has a nice collection of ‘Kick Me’ signs taped to his back

“I’m not a Coach who goes to a club, wins something and then leaves.”

Said Rafa Benitez, who won trophies at Inter and Chelsea and then left

“But as good as we can be, one thing I can guarantee - there will always be oversights. Otherwise, we would not be human. Maybe we can be traded in for robots…”

Don’t give the clubs ideas, Referees’ Association President Marcello Nicchi

“Referees have no fans. If someone wants to shift the focus away from the flop of their team, they know that it is enough to talk about us. It is an easy excuse, to get a grip on public opinion. There is talk of conspiracy, allegiance, errors in command and other trivialities like that. And it can camouflage their limits.”

Nicchi says referees are the victims of the REAL conspiracy!

“Is Paul Pogba a treasure for Juventus? He’s more than that, he’s a treasure for all of humanity!”

Andrea Agnelli urges UNESCO to register his feet as a world heritage site

“And if someone think to beat me just let me know! I own you all I bet! I never lost!”

If only Mario Balotelli could play ping-pong for Milan rather than football

“Sometimes he compliments me and my character: ‘you’re a lion!’ Other times he motivates me. For example, at San Siro, at one point, he asked me: ‘Carlos, are you there?’ I answered yes.”

Tevez reveals Antonio Conte’s man-management technique ranges from animal impressions to Knock Knock jokes

“We all know that when the World Cup begins everyone will be Italian, waving their little flags. It’s all to be expected.”

Cesare Prandelli makes space on the bandwagon and checks his investment in tricolour flag production

“Prandelli’s code of ethics is a farce. He only enforces it when he wants to. Mr Balotelli has done so much wrong without ever being punished.”

Osvaldo punched a teammate at Southampton, yet Angelo Di Livio singles out Mario?

“I have enough experience to know it is best not to get involved.”

Gigi Buffon’s best advice is to ask someone else for advice

“It is easy to say appointing Alberto Malesani was a mistake now, but we had still lost some games even before bringing him in.”

It was pretty easy to say it was a mistake at the time, Sassuolo director Nereo Bonato

“I expected at least half a call from Prandelli to ask how Chiellini is. I find it a little impolite. I expect the headlines: ‘Conte attacks Prandelli’.”

Conte walked right into that one

“In Italy, no-one wants to use TV images for replays, but then they disqualify players based on video evidence. Why?”

Rudi Garcia wishes the Disciplinary Commission was a little more lo-fi

“After playing two good games without winning, I’m hoping for two wins while playing badly.”

Adriano Galliani got half that deal

“Borja Valero is an extraordinary talent. If he was Italian, he’d always have a place in my team.”

Prandelli tries to tempt the Spaniard over with pasta, pizza and gelato

“When players are battling for space in dead ball situations they stand their ground and they try to stop the opponent. Daniele De Rossi did that in a way that was a bit too exuberant, but he did not punch the opponent. He touched him with one hand on the head and then with the other he tried to throw off his opponent. There was no malice in it.”

Somehow we doubt Roma director Walter Sabatini would feel the same way on the receiving end of that fist

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