Monday March 24 2014
They Said What?!

Clarence Seedorf takes the builder's approach, Sinisa Mihajlovic quotes Dante and Rafa Benitez explains Napoli's style as Susy Campanale has the silliest comments.

“I am not responsible for the situation that was created. I am here to improve the situation.”

Clarence Seedorf walked into the Milan locker room, sighed and asked ‘What cowboy did this work, then? Allegri? Pah! Needs to be totally redone. This team’s a death trap.’

“Dante talked about Ulysses when he urges his men to push past the Pillars of Hercules. I’d like to do the same, pushing my men to keep going and never rest on their laurels. We don’t know where our Pillars of Hercules are. If they want to follow me, I assure it won’t be ‘a witless flight.’ When I arrived we were in Hell, now we are in Purgatory and I want to reach Paradise.”

Journalists at Sinisa Mihajlovic’s Press conference need CliffsNotes. There’ll be a pop quiz afterwards.

“Do I use the carrot or the stick? I only use the carrot.”

Seedorf takes his inspiration from that great philosopher Bugs Bunny

“Taking on Inter to me was like running away with a blonde.”

Massimo Moratti had a few glorious moments until she spent all his money

“European football is attacking football and that is what the television audiences and the fans like. Italian football however concerns itself a lot with not conceding goals.”

Nobody can accuse Rafa Benitez’s Napoli of being concerned with not conceding goals

“I am a little surprised at the reaction here, as I thought it was a spectacular performance and now people are focusing only on the result.”

People tend to do that after you’ve crashed out of Europe, Benitez

“I had many proposals and I pondered them for a while, but decided to leave for Lazio. I hope for my sake that I made the right choice.”

Filip Djordjevic has that look of a man who drunk-ordered an expensive item on eBay

“Those who base their own success on how they measure up to others are losers.”

Roberto Donadoni opts for a more Zen approach

“Juan Cuadrado is ‘irrational’ and that unpredictability is his strength, but it can also become a weakness because he takes his teammates by surprise too.”

Vincenzo Montella says the Colombian would be unstoppable in a team of one

“Going at this extraordinary pace, we are pushing those behind us over the edge into depression. They will hopefully be disconcerted by this and fall behind.”

Antonio Conte won’t be satisfied until Rudi Garcia and Benitez are weeping in the gutter

“When off the field in England, nobody cares what you do.”

Has anyone ever cared what Antonio Nocerino does?

“As a player at Milan, they used to call me ‘bone’ – because I would not let things go.”

We’re glad Donadoni explained the story behind that nickname, otherwise it would’ve been confusing

“In Italy, we think everything is born at the feet of the players, in fact everything comes from the mind.”

Arrigo Sacchi suggests Milan sign Derren Brown

“Sometimes it helps just to listen and give the fans a voice, so they know we hear them.”

If Seedorf can’t hear thousands of people shouting abuse in unison, then he needs to get his ears checked

“Links to Napoli? It would be an ideal place for a crazy head like mine.”

Antonio Cassano would be the classic lunatic taking over the asylum

“Following a conversation with the manager, it happened that I decided to change leagues and play in a different country.”

Nemanja Vidic found chatting to David Moyes inspirational

“Ilicic is a rare player. His vision and creativity is amazing – it’s as if he has eyes in the back of his head.”

Maurizio Zamparini explains Josip’s finishing skills

“We have to tell the fans not to behave like those of less successful teams.”

Sacchi has to find a less successful team than Milan this season

“I think that what Milan are going through at the moment is a negative cycle. But what Milan and its protagonists have achieved will remain in history forever.”

Carlo Ancelotti could say the same about Pro Patria

“I’m proud to say that I’m a mummy’s boy!”

Giuseppe Rossi puts the Italian in Italian-American

“We are planning a metro stop inside the stadium walls.”

Catania President Antonino Pulvirenti gives football fans all the fun of the commuter lifestyle

Keep up to date with the latest news and action from Spain's Primera Division with Football Espana - from the team behind Football Italia.

Have your say...
Funny as always. My favorite sport column. Keep it up Susy.
on the 27th March, 2014 at 2:40am

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