Saturday July 12 2014
They Said What?!

Felipe Scolari picks the wrong moment for sarcasm, Mike Tyson adds to Luis Suarez's woes and Italy want a time machine in Susy Campanale's quotes round-up.

“We suffered a bad defeat, worse than we could’ve ever imagined, but it’s not all bad. We were so bad that we reached the semi-final of a World Cup...”

When losing a World Cup semi-final 7-1 on home turf, a shrug and sarcasm might not be the best tactic for Luiz Felipe Scolari

“An old jerk, arrogant, repulsive, conceited and ridiculous.”

Neymar’s agent Wagner Ribeiro channels Germany and destroys Scolari

“It’s honestly hard to explain what happened. It’s like trying to explain something inexplicable.”

Julio Cesar now has ‘Brazil 1-7 Germany’ as the dictionary definition of inexplicable

“After losing the semi-final to Italy in 2006, we know how Brazil, the players, Mr Scolari and the fans feel.”

Joachim Low and Germany lost 2-0 in the last minutes of extra time, not 7-1!

“Luis Suarez’s bite? I understand it. It was just one moment in which the competition can make the blood in your veins boil and it overpowers your rationality. Sometimes you become something that you are not.”

While getting a character reference from Mike Tyson isn’t helping his public image, Suarez was actually worse by refusing to acknowledge he’d done anything wrong

“Giancarlo Abete and Cesare Prandelli walked away at the moment they were most needed and now I see Prandelli has already gone into a happy marriage in Turkey, where there is less fiscal pressure. Stepping aside is not the kind of gesture that our football needs right now. I do not thank Abete for abandoning us.”

The FIAT workers in Turin don’t thank Andrea Agnelli’s family for moving their factory to Poland during a recession either

“I told Mario Balotelli that he needs to focus on training, working and playing in the real world, not the virtual one. If he stops existing in this parallel universe and gets his feet on the ground, then he can become what he thinks he already is.”

Prandelli reveals Balo really does believe he’s one of the SuperMario Brothers

“We told Krul that he would be a possibility for the penalties, but we didn’t tell Cillessen, as we didn’t want to ruin his preparation.”

Louis Van Gaal should’ve yelled ‘Surprise!’ at the moment of the extra time substitution

“Van Gaal was right and did well to make the change. Azeglio Vicini should’ve done the same in 1990.”

Italy’s second choice goalkeeper Stefano Tacconi also insists he wouldn’t have flapped at a cross like Walter Zenga

“Balotelli did what he is capable of. Nothing more and nothing less.”

Mauro German Camoranesi both asks and answers the question: Is that really the best you can do?

“Antonio Conte called me and said the only thing that changes from being a player to a Coach is you don’t sleep at night anymore!”

Pippo Inzaghi realises a tactician is like a new father

“Seeing him running away from Italy after the chaos he caused is not remotely out of character. It is in the man’s DNA. Prandelli is a person who is incapable of doing things properly.”

Fiorentina patron Diego Della Valle believes Prandelli’s career should be genetically modified

“I will watch the Germany game from afar today... I am back to being one of 200m Brazil fans.”

It’s considerably better than being on the team losing 7-1, Neymar

“I absolutely do not agree that Argentina are nothing without me.”

They are something, Leo Messi, but we can’t say what on a family website

“Perhaps it is not easy to notice, if you do not work with him every day, but Juan Manuel Iturbe is a Formula 1 car.”

Does Andrea Mandorlini mean he goes round in circles, never overtakes anyone and has a tendency to break down?

“I was rugby tackled from all sides today.”

To Arjen Robben that means being tapped lightly on the shoulder

“Am I in shape? I am always in shape when I’m on holiday!”

Mario Gomez wouldn’t get injured so much if he played in flip-flops

“Now we must study Germany carefully to ensure we are not surprised by any combination of players they use.”

Douglas Maicon and Brazil evidently skived off that lesson

“Miroslav Klose is an indestructible player.”

Lazio President Claudio Lotito forgets the German spent most of last season on the treatment table

“You’ll have to ask the magicians about the boy’s future.”

Alberto Aquilani’s agent tells him to pick a club, any club...

“I want to start a cycle. Beppe Iachini signed a two year contract with the option of a third year. I’m not exaggerating when I say that he can make Palermo the Italian Atletico Madrid.”

We’ve heard that before, Maurizio Zamparini. Many, many times

“We are the most beautiful couple in the world. Because he is our father, the father of the players, and I can be the mother.”

Sampdoria President Massimo Ferrero and Sinisa Mihajlovic star in the Italian version of Modern Family

“A player is good if they are hungry and leave the field with sweat on their shirt. I was born with a sweaty shirt, I am a sweaty CEO.”

Ferrero is the CEO with BO

“Try and picture the scene. Your wife smiling at you, or your husband hugging you. A friend you can count on, a dinner in a special place. Imagine music, art. Imagine the best goal Inter have ever scored, the game that gave you the biggest thrill. Imagine it. The best ever. Now that those sounds, tastes and colours are dancing in your head, now that you're thinking about the best thing ever, think of it in terms of the Nerazzurri. In terms of Inter. The team that makes you heart beat faster. A picture is gradually filling your mind, right? First a few simple lines, then circles come together and finally a star. It is starting to take shape. “It” is our new logo, now part of our team. Our corporate identity.”

Imagine Giovanni Trapattoni and Helenio Herrera scoffing at this inane management-speak tripe

“Up until the Federal meeting on August 18 we are thinking of a 22-team Serie B, then we’ll see what happens.”

The fact the season starts on August 29 shows why Italian football is so disorganised, Andrea Abodi

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Have your say...
I think Prandelli is really out of line with his comment on Balotelli. I agree with him, but he forgets that he guaranteed Balotelli the #9 two years ago.
on the 13th July, 2014 at 6:26pm

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